Jan 15 - 21

Have you ever come to a situation where you knew if you proceeded to find an answer to an unfavorable situation, you knew you would be very sorry?  

So, when we bought our house in the foothills 14 years ago, the downstairs bathroom came with this free standing shower that resembles something out of Star Trek. It is honestly so complicated that we haven’t used it in 12 years. Anyway, I was walking by when I saw this unusual object on the top that coincidentally matched the white color of the shower. I reach up and grab this thing and as I turn it I see on the other side of this object, it is a empty sour cream container. OK, I was thinking, I hadn’t bought sour cream in a very long time. So knowing that, why did I proceed to open it?

Jan 8 - 14

Addiction is a terrible consequence of imbibing in something you shouldn’t.

Special needs kids are not easy to raise and to remedy some crazy situations my wife and I should drink alcohol, but instead she makes cookies. We don’t need family therapy because we have cookies. When we have a difficult situation we eat more cookies. When there is a total meltdown because something didn’t arrive in time from Amazon, we eat even more cookies. It doesn’t help that it is cold outside and it gets dark early, but warm cookies seem to correct all the world’s troubles. However soon, we need to figure out a way stop this addictive behavior. My suggestion is we drink more, but my wife is a responsible adult. I used to admire her for that quality, but now, I am unsure. Anyway, we soon have to transition away from delicious, mouthwatering, warm, freshly made chocolate oatmeal cookies. I do remind my wife that chocolate is not good for dogs, so she makes plain oatmeal cookies for Cooper, but I eat most of those as well.

Please don’t tell Cooper or my wife.

Jan 1 - 7

I hope everyone had a nice Christmas, unfortunately, mine was very stressful. I worry what people think of me and apparently I worry what dogs think of me even more. So I am the person when I am eating, if a dog is staring at me I feed it. I recently went to a friend’s party and their dog immediately came up to me and just stared at me. Don’t worry, I am very discreet. Anyway, my daughter came over for Christmas and asked us if we would watch their dog, Bear, while they went skiing for a few days. Not a problem except the dog is very allergic to all food except rabbit, so they left me just enough to get by until they got back. So, can you imagine, anytime I am eating anything, Cooper is right there. Well now I can’t feed him because Bear is there is too. So now I have 2 dogs following me around and staring at me constantly. I almost called a therapist. 

Dec 25 - 31

It is your lucky day,  I am going to sing Jingle Bells for you. 

Well you have to imagine me singing it. 

Just think of Andrea Bocelli, my voice is very similar. After all, we are both from Italy, well my parents were but I am sure my voice is right there with his.

Ok, here it goes:

Jingle bells, Jingle bells…

Well, you know how it goes.

Oh and I appreciate all of you not mentioning the 300 pounds I have put on this Holiday Season. I promise to try to get back to something close to what I used to be.

Try.

Everyone please have a wonderful Christmas.

From Frank and family