The conspiracy theory about fire hydrants.
What is a fire hydrant's primary purpose? You would think it was to put out fires, when in fact it is very rare that a fire hydrant is ever used for water. So, what are they most used for? Yes, a place for our dogs to relieve themselves.
When fire hydrants were first installed they had a sweet smell to them (probably from the paint), which attracted dogs, and therefore they would want to mark their spot there. However, there is a group of us that believe that the firemen didn't appreciate the hydrants' notoriety, and so, they repainted all the fire hydrants (obviously at night), to distract all dogs from living their dream. I think this is very sad. Unless we do something, this is a tradition that will soon be forgotten.
So I am trying to recruit a force to go out and repaint all the hydrants in their original sweet-smelling red paint (obviously at night). What do you say? Are you in?
I will leave signup sheets by the register.