This Covid-19 virus has gotten all of us near fanatical paranoia. So I have spent the last few days binge watching every “zombie apocalyptic” movie ever made. I now feel that I have a workable solution to all of this. First of all we must learn sign language, I will explain in a moment. Next at the front door of each restaurant I will have a stack of crosses. You know, the kind that scare away vampires. Next we will have glass bell helmets like Sandy’s from “ Sponge Bob Square Pants” (by the way if you study Sponge Bob you would see he predicted the Coronavirus almost 20 years ago). With these round helmets it is hard to have verbal conversations, that is why we need to learn American Sign Language, ASL. Now we will be able to proceed with our normal lives. Of course we will have to convert all our specials into smoothies, but that is a small price to pay for survival.
OK, folks we are trying our best to make sure no one gets sick. My email the other day discouraging patrons from coming in seems to be working and if we are not too busy and customers have space about them I think we can get by. Again, please stay home if you feel ill. I feel for all of us who have allergies, and have to constantly explain, “No, really it is just an allergy.”
We will laugh about this one day, it might be in heaven or hell but we will laugh about this.